piano lessons. No girlfriend. What's up.
so i decided not to tell her that her fiance is cheating since i already bought the bridesmaid dess
Her name is Sherri and her sister's are Brandy and Champagne. Of course I want to meet her parents.
she blew me in the men's room in the restaurant. it was a french bistro, so it was okay
I got out of bed with her to go smoke a bowl with her roommate which was fine but I passed out when I went upstairs to take a piss.
Yeah.. she's probably not gonna call.
He says he quit drinking. I'd like to have a moment of silence for losing the best drunken hookup ever. We will build a memorial to his awesome cock.
Was last night real? Did I lick your forehead while you laid in between my legs while we laid next to your boyfriend?
No exaggeration. At the gas station she handed me the mop from over the counter and told me that's my last drink of the night
You had your dick do your apologizing for you last night. Apology accepted.
If I come back tomorrow to find a certain football player tied up and locked in your closet, shit's gonna get real.
I'll set him free tomorrow morning ;)
I've never seen a guy eye-fuck someone so hard in my entire life. I thought he would develop laser vision, bore holes into your body, and not even realize your innards would be spilling everywhere. That's how bad it was.
I just want someone to shove bread from panera down my throat
I might go to an NA meeting just to fuck that boy in the bathroom.
I realized it was late, and he was my brother in humanity and another incarnation of my own life force and consciousness, so I regained control of myself, thanked him for helping me, and went home.
I’m on my way to fuck the new hockey player
Ride him like a Zamboni
Randomize
