I really don't want to move...I'm having a motivation problem.
kev is about to show us pictures of the tranny he accidentally fucked last night.
I'll be there in 10
You were in the bathroom for two hours practicing "Revenge Faces".
Whiskey + Water + Crystal Lite does NOT = refreshing summer time drink.....
If you haven't seen a huge black man in tiny red snowflake shorts that barely cover his dick, then you don't know what I'm going through.
The worst decision I made last night was allowing myself to be duct taped to the ceiling
Why are you there anyways?
Pickin up ball pit balls from craigslist
Thought I was doing makeup today for a photo shoot for a short film. WRONG. Try I'm on the set for a Fucking Sci-Fi PORN.
I decided I was tough enough to wax my bikini area myself. Long story short, I'll be drunk when you get home
I woke wondering who the hell was in my bed. Then i felt boobs and remembered Haha. Thirsty Thursday killed my liver and my homosexuality
WHY DID I MAKE A 7 minute video of me eating crackers and cheese when I was high
Send it to me
wtf guys I thought we agreed on no more knives. So much for not destroying the house
My mom just woke me up with a cowboy hat and sunglasses on. It's 7 am and she's drunk.
from across the room i saw you look into your beer and whisper "i love you"
I sent her a dick pic and used brett Favre's dick pick. She asked me why I had pictures of old men's dicks saved on my phone... I just can't win bro
I cant promise hot guys but i can promise alcohol which is close enough.
Randomize
