careful when you do the walk of shame, they are handing out bibles on campus
My mom came into my room and told me to flip off the tv. I gave it the middle finger. Note to self: STOP SMOKING THIS SHIT
He screamed for everyone to hide, unplugged the music, then talked to the cop. Last I saw he was high fiving him...
He's the fucking cop whisperer.
at the end of the day, college isnt gonna be for everyone... and some of us are just going to have to learn how to breathe underwater while sucking cock.
And for those of you keeping score at home this is the 7th time I've found Casey passed out head first in a bowl of chips at a party I didn't even know she was at
She wanted me to watch her masterbate and after she thanked me for a wonderful evening and left. This state is weird.
How do you feel? I threw up in a towel. Also, a lot of other things.
The next time you try to drunkenly strip me in public let's make sure it's not anywhere near the daiquiri factory or a group of police officers.
I desperately wanted to wear your shirt.
IDK. when she left she was wearing her bra like an eyepatch and offering to shiver the timbers of the dorm patrol.
It's a little sad/awesome that I scored coke within 60 seconds of walking in the bar.
The student becomes the teacher.
You know your acid trip is going well when the orange you're eating gives you a life lesson
just woke up and currently drinking copious amounts of eggnog straight from the carton to replenish the electrolytes lost last night
I tried to suck your dick underwater and almost drowned
Oh, I also stabbed a guy Friday and he still asked me out
Justin has passed out on the toilet in a locked stall. Stay tuned for pics.
Randomize