Is it weird that we showed each other our pussy's and pointed out the good and bad things about each others??
and when he finished he started shouting "swim boys SWIM"
The last thing I remember was talking about the economic viability of cock ring manufacturing... we had some good ideas
At least I cut out the pieces of your hair where I braided gum into it last night. Thank me later.
She was eating whipped cream out of a plunger at 3 am in the morning. Yet somehow she still had an elegance about her.
What's worse: not calling my parents in Dallas to make sure they're alright or not taking shelter to masturbate all over my douchebag roommates clothes?
I worry about you.
Just sayin. I pissed on his couch, and ruined his stove. If he's not mad, we're partying there every weekend...
We're living together and you don't know if I've seen Titanic?!
I think we've reached the point in the summer were we need to go back to school. I was so bored yesterday I nearly bought blow dart gun.
You kept asking us from the backseat if you were driving ok and then you kept talking to your hiccups and yelling at them to "stop it already!"
Vodka, rum, moonshine, I don't care, just bring like 5gallons.
I don't want the fire department to come out here twice in one weekend because of your god damn vape.
When dealing with embarassing medical issues, don't you want your brother's wife to be the one fishing around up your ass?
it was a hallmark card with butt plugs.
Put my boyfriend in a chastity cage while he was passed out last night. Now I control his orgasms.
Randomize
