He's like the fucking Houdini of bras. Not only did I not feel him take it off I didn't find it until two days later.
I'm pretty sure I saw a man standing on a table with no shirt on getting sugar thrown at him while "pour some sugar on me" blaring while the cops were in the house.
there is potential here for me to have a consistent access to someone's dick who isn't actually an asshole. i think i'm ready for a relationship.
Of course she said it wasn't that good, I don't bring my A game to pity fuck the thrice divorced girl from work
She stole my hamster. idk who she was, she just walked in and said she knew Keith so she stayed, drank 6 beers, and then stole Charles.
at the last minute we also decided to throw an egg in the beer bong. and he drank it, shell and all.
The last thing I remember is pushing my way into the bathroom and dumping a 40 on him. We havent talked since.
can you come back were all locked out and alyssia's still inside passed out on the floor but more importantly i left a beer in there that's not finished
I think it's god's punishment for my behavior in Vegas . Lies were told. Angels were defiled. Pools were pissed in
He laid on the ground 100 ft from the car crying about how he just wanted to be home already
Where were you last night, and why am I not surprised that drag queens were involved?
I remember us getting kicked out of the bar, but neither of us know why. We woke up next to chicken bones on a plate with spoons, and my car has mud all over it including places where feet shouldn't be, like the speakers on the car door.
Just did body shot off a midget. Pretty good start.
if i get arrested im counting on you to get a picture of it
I told the cops they couldn't arrest me until they found my shoe. Now I have the grant county cops looking for my heels by the rail road tracks.
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