How do you politely bring up someone's criminal record?
I'm pretty sure I saw a man standing on a table with no shirt on getting sugar thrown at him while "pour some sugar on me" blaring while the cops were in the house.
Please make the clown in the corner stop judging me. I mean he's the one with paint on his face. I don't need him judge judying me.
"Shots" of grape juice. I fucking hate Utah soooo fucking much.
You kept yelling "wood grain wheel" and grinding on fat chicks.
The hell is wrong with me
That's like the cock version of a mortal kombat fatality.
I didnt want you guys to know I needed to puke, so I just nonchalantly did in my solo cup and threw it out the window
It wasnt until i started dancing that i realized i pissed myself dude. I dont think shes gonna call me back.
It's like sleep walking but with blowjobs
When my beach tent arrives , I strongly suggest quitting our jobs and becoming homeless beach drunks
The only thing he told me before he passed out was that he is from Buffalo and I'm a bitch.
he's been 21 for 38 minutes and he's already trying to fist fight this dude over his girl
awwwww babys first drunken mistake
THEY LEFT ME IN A CLUB BY MYSELF. I’M SO ANNOYED. I’M GOING TO FUCK THEIR BARTENDER FRIEND. Caps only because I’m really mad.
Last time I had a one night stand he ended up stalking me for two months.
So you're not picking up this weekend?
This weekend, I am Angela, visiting from Calgary. We'll have to roleplay this.
Just realized that I indirectly pay for sex through my cable bill
Wow. He is an expensive lay
I still have to figure out the cost per lay. It could be a financially sound investment
Randomize
