Ok let's jusst not talk today bc then we'll just do dangerous things but I'll say hello
oh and i feel obligated to inform you that there will be no sexin' because it's 'lady time' for me. so this ain't a booty call.
Manager just farted into the intercom. Whole place heard it. A number of people stopped everything and looked at him. Best. Night. Ever.
I blacked out, fell off a swingset, and thought I was Liz Lemon for almost an hour.
Why wouldn't u just let me ride the washing machine
I got cut off for calling the flower girl a slut. What are you doing?
we fucked while standing on a ladder. challenging, but worth it.
I have too much pride to pick his chest hair out of my mouth again
NO. NO LET HIS PENIS TOUCH YOU.
You know how there are wrinkles in your brain? What if they were filled with potato chips? That's kind of how my head feels now.
I can taunt you with whatever I want. Like batman and sex.
I'm not pregnant. Security came before he could.
I'm just more comfortable with the bondage
Will keep you updated on the sexual orientation of my new guy
Pretty sure my boss knows there's Jack smell coming out of my pores right now... He just gave me a look...
Randomize
