Well to be completely honest its more of a 'i wanna do things to you that your parents would not enjoy hearing about' mood
In the car with my brother. His CD went from 2pac to Taylor Swift. I'm concerned. It wasn't a mistake, he knows all the words.
she just uttered the sweetest sentence in the english language...my stripper friends are coming over
no, no, no. omg. i said i wanted a SANDWICH! not a picture of your dick. damn cant you read? SANDWICH! now im blinded. great job.
Just so we're on the same page, we cannot have been the first people to have ever thought about shooting that guy with crossbow
I had to close one eye to read the questions on my final this morning. That hungover.
Sometimes one must go to great lengths and make great sacrifices to get drunk. I willingly accept the challenge.
We all have our weaknesses that drive us crazy. We happen to have one in common, 21 year olds. Your secrets safe. Touch his penis.
I whispered "you're doing a great Job" when he was fucking me. Then high fived him.
I was trying to climb into what I thought was a bunk bed.. Turns out it was just a cabinet under the sink in a bathroom
Need to find a Santa hat to fit my penis, he deserves to be festive too.
should we try and roll a cross joint since its good friday? you know, for jesus
i'm gonna crowd surf you onto his dick
I would rather contract a disease that would eat me from the inside out and make me suffer painfully while it slowly killed me than to put myself through the 20 minutes of agony that is having sex with you ever ever again.
I think you're talking dirty but I'm not sure???
Also you think METH is on the same level of wanting to see the movie cats? We’re gonna unpack that later
Randomize
