so it turns out you can rearrange the letters in "scottsdale" to spell "milf city." who knew?
Now you know why i just sit on the toilet and scream
saw a man tazing a raccoon in the middle of the street last night... normal
he called AT&T to make sure that he had insurance before he threw his cell phone into the fountain.
Apparently I have a urinal in my bedroom
But don't worry I didn't actually get stitches, although according to the health center I probably should have
I need to get a life, I am either crying at every glee episode or just wanting to blow rails off photos of us
whiskey
stop
tequila
you're fuckin up my ability to be a agrown up
Im coming down to miami this weekend
We shall drink from the everclear river
Everyone is now just referring to it as "the night Hannah couldn't get laid" so needless to say you didn't miss much
after he went down on me he said he wanted an air freshener for his car scented like my vag. i cant even.
I think I should just be a madame. Fuck it.
I'm just gonna post fliers on telephone poles like, "who wantsta be a hooooooe?!"
I need to wash the frat house off of me
I hate that I still want him to look at me as the vagina that got away.
i dunno dude, he took his shirt off and is rubbing jello shots on himself. i think he's done
Randomize
