Yes but life is bad with poopy sheets
He pulled the washer 5 feet out from the wall screaming about quarters
DO NOT GO IN OUR BATHROOM. it cannot be unseen
some guy i've known for a week sent me nudes saying "you're welcome" i need an award for this birthday
this one kid was speed-mumbling about putting broccoli in the printer
She said, I've heard about you, from girls you wouldn't even be interested in. What?
Good thing my vagina doesn't have a chronometer on it. I'm sure my fiance would be horrified. Probably 10 miles from this past weekend alone.
My hair tie broke, stole my one-night stands daughters pink sparkly one. BEST hair-tie I have ever used...
I found my wallet. Still have no idea when I put mad dog in my steel water bottle, though...
5 seconds ago I had no idea that a fart could travel so fastly thru the tanning bed. I taste it in the back of my neck.
Remind me to tell you: When threeways go awry, my MLK weekend story.
Well, I just puked in the shower in case anyone wants an update on how my day is going
I mean, if I asked you, would you cum on cotton candy for me?
did he think i wouldnt notice the naked girl in the backseat
I want to disappear from this job like a fart in the wind.💨
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