Did you hit it?
Turns out she was a he. but to answer your question, yes.
so i made out with some dude last night at the bar. and some girl just stood there and watched. i felt bad so i made out with her too. She looked like she felt left out.
Let's just say, at one point i got woken up at 4am by a naked guy who was offering me steak, in a cup.
She crushed my hand with the box spring last time, so it's all good.
Come over. Drunk tacos.
That isn't even a sentence.
I kept the important parts.
Being high is an amazing excuse. I was using him for the potential of a beret, come on. I'd do that sober.
I'm in the city buying alcohol. I just got warned by a homeless man on the street that I shouldn't look so pretty "in these parts"
Just because you can put your penis in it does not make it "good stuff".
its before 9am and ive already had to dip my dick and balls in a glass of milk. probably isnt a good sign for how today is going to go.
we were the definition of too high: argued for 10 minutes about who was gonna get the condom (it was 2 feet away on the night stand) and past out watching adventure time.
You kept running up to married couples, taking their pictures and begging for them not to get divorced
So I'm guessing that puking on a camper is a straight path to instant termination?
But in defense of this shit summer we've had, I totally perfected my shotgunning skills. I have achieved my summer goal.
His crazy is a thing to be cherished
i'd like to schedule a penis for 4pm please.
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