no morals, dignity, or self respect ... just an empty condom wrapper and a facebook request
White Russians with skim milk. Fuck I'm healthy.
I have no memory of puking on someone. Was he cute?
its like playing clue every morning after we party. she did him in the kitchen with..oh god.
got high and went straight for the Doritos. I'm some kind of walking cliche.
I'm pretty sure this is how polyamorous relationships begin.
I paid your cover too so you're on the list as tits mcgee. You're welcome :D
He stopped mid-sex to read the subtitles on a Korean movie we had playing in the background.
You know you have done too many drugs when you gum the sugar off your margarita without even thinking twice
WHAT KIND OF SELF RESPECTING 28 YEAR OLD WOMAN WAKES UP IN A FRAT HOUSE?!?'
The cougar kind?
You're at a grade school volley ball game with a yeti of tequila. You've passed extra
I just asked my mom if I could be the drunk realitive at the reunion. She said as long as I'm not obvious.
i ran into the Jo the housecleaner earlier this morning. i mentioned i had a little hangover and she asked what the occasion was.. i replied "Tuesday" without thinking. she judged the shit out of me.
well we woke up in different beds than the ones we originally fell asleep in, you were butt naked, and your boyfriend was sleeping on a cot in the middle of the kitchen. that might be why he's mad.
Or is it distressingly heterosexual?
Randomize