he pushed my hair back because he said it made me look like kelly kapowski and he told me to call him zach
Fuck that. Livers are so overdramatic and attention hungry.
she was sure she was an eel. She spent 40 minutes sliterhing on the floor to get to her room
She's a Laker fan, her sister is a Celtic fan... no matter who wins I'm getting a celebration bj from one of them!
the whole story woulnd't be so depressing if i had made out with ANYONE but the piano player.
Im in the STD packet for new students this year. And im going to be plastered tonight so be forewarned
I even tried crushing up viagra and putting it in his beer... And the next day he found the package on the counter. I told him it was for my friends husband.
Drinking, I should not. Got here I don't know. Still drunk, I am. At courtneys.
Wearing the 'Let's Party' thong feels weird without you...
From what I can tell at a cursory glance, it seems that last night I fell asleep on string cheese and it melted into my bra.
You'd be proud! I didn't lose my id this time... It got confiscated
This is a whole new generation of premature ejaculators
So red wine goes with eggs, right? Because that's all I have in the house to cook and the drinking options are either wine or scotch
I'll like his pictures on Instagram every once and a while so that when he sees my name he is reminded of the best blow job he's ever gotten.
Is it just me or did we have a heart to heart talk while you were naked last night?
Randomize
