You know, I really only think drinking is a problem if you're not good at it.
I love you. And by the way. I found out a way for you to train your gag reflex. Elliot taught us in math.
don't forget friday is see who can get the most free drinks at the gay bar contest. winner gets $50
I see you've set aside this special time to humiliate yourself in public.
Guess who has got hockey tickets for tonight? Only cost me road head going to and coming from the game
I still smell like men's body wash from that drunken shower I took at that stranger's home last night.
My nipple piercings are like the guardrails, that's why they feel so safe.
Dave when you find that upper decker at your house its from me but its for Jill not you
Did you high five my face last night?
Yes. Yes I did.
I've started budgeting for next year. It looks like I'll be crying tears of dollar bills and handing them over to pay back my unholy college debt.
Just put on slippers before underwear so you know where my priorities are
The ride home was alright, we hooked up in the street next to his car after he smashed into the guard rail
He ate me out while I was playing bejeweled. It was the greatest moment of my life.
he sent me a picture of him holding out his pinky so we could pinky promise. i have to fuck him now
Just once, can I please come back to a room that doesn't smell like beer and cum?
Randomize
