I met a girl last nite that charged by the inch. i didnt have enough money but i figured shed be a good deal for u
how about we just leave your boyfriend out of this
i'm at the gym and so are four guys who have seen my tits. i need winter break.
I wonder if Barack Obama has ever been this drunk.
Just think, if your stepsister would've gotten knocked up 2 years earlier, she could've had a TV show. What a bitch.
I just want you to know if you wake up tomorrow morning and wreak of mustard, I was not involved.
just drunkenly made mashed potatoes at midnight. what have you done for your calorie intake lately?
The first couple times was just weird, but after last night, I'm beginning to think you have a real problem banging pregnant women who are carrying someone elses child.
The less money I spend on drugs, the happier my mom will be.
Welcome to a new world. May the gods of weed smile upon you as you embark on exploring this new dimension.
When you put my balls in your mouth i just want to buy you expensive gifts...you know what i mean?
good news: smoking weed at school again, quality of life has improved drastically
Maybe whip a sausage around while you do it and pour some beer on you. Like a German white snake video
Came out of blackout state to the curtains torn down & the headboard laid on top of him. & yes he was still breathing
i was sitting on the kitchen floor shaking my gallon of vodka at people and asking if they wanted to climb the heaven hill... getting dumped is the best thing that has ever happend to me
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