So J keeps drinking his last bit of drink, then spitting it out and drinks it again. Savor the flavor?
I made myself breakfast and everything and then whoever's house it actually was came downstairs very upset.
I just remembered yelling "they're gonna let me be a lawyer! Me! Why would they do that?"
It only takes once for you to drunkly piss on a chick for her to lose interest in you.
okay, certainly we can't screw this up, and even as I type, I know we will
while we were dancing I voluntarily took my bra off and hung it around his neck as a necklace. 2011 lets go
just filed my taxes drunk as balls. i may be going to jail.
I'd recommend you leave that level of crazy to the experts. I'd start with an under appreciated soccer mom if I were you.
I managed to get through my meeting without throwing up in someone else's office, so there's that for an accomplishment today.
Do you think I could get someone from tinder to drive me to the airport?
Hypothetically speaking, when I get a sugar glider would it be frowned upon to bring it Ito classes with me in m pocket?
I feel like I could get pregnant watching Zac Efron do yard work in this movie
I need to be her Aladdin, and show her the world. The sex world.
Apparently I made a chicken patty, angrily took it out of the microwave, walked outside, and threw it over the balcony. #me
Do me a favor and scream dirty things at him in a polite sexy, come hither way
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