Dude she looked like Jerry Garcia's knuckles
Please tell me I didn't pass out while we were having sex last night... and if so I am sooooo sorry.
also i tucked his toothbrush in my shirt. why? i dont know.
how many princess gummy vitamins will it take to negate last nights drinking binge?
you thought your tounge was "malfunctioning" because every time u spoke it wouldnt sit still.
sooo my mom just yelled up the stairs " you left your bowl down by the computer"....aaand for a second I forgot cereal bowls still existed
I would describe it as pure and unadulterated shock, mixed with horror and a touch of nausea.
It's great having no responsibilities. In normal life I would be freaking the fuck out right about now. But the only worry I have from last night is where i got this shower caddy full of cookies. God I love college.
what whaaaat?! I BET YOU WIN IN THE TEETH DEPARTMENT.
Plans for halloween need to outrank Caesar, Cleopatra and Mark Antony's threesome...just saying
If you don't wanna wax my ass just say so.
Was the picture of her twerking on a fake plant sufficient?
HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT
So I just ran in to the Couger you saw me take home last month who i haven't talked to since then at Wawa and she was PISSED.. APPARENTLY i fucked her niece last week
I now know he's been cheating for a while. I also know HER name, address, phone number, Facebook account, religion and zodiac sign. I feel like I'm earning my restraining order. Point is, never fuck over a librarian.
While finding our clothes afterwards he says..."So do we like have to talk after this?"
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