I don't do stupid things anymore. I do stupid people.
So pretty much, I was trying to piece last night together and remembered a point where I was pointing to you heart then touching your face. I'm not sure that I ever translated that to "I like your personality better than your looks" but that's what I meant
is it wrong that I want a "Where The Wild Things Are" tshirt that points to my junk?
I'm drinking rum and coke straight from the 2 liter bottle.
Your kinda stuck between a rock and his hard dick on this one..
he/she has shaved legs and makeup on. but a spare tire stomach, high socks with high heels...a wig and glasses. and still talked like a man. it was a nightmare scenario
It's also dangerous to ride a bike down the stairs after a few beers, but I've done it.
I woke up in nothing but a shower cap and your sparkling coke straw snorter thing inbetween my toes. Explain.
He was hiding behind my bedroom door. at noon. Wearing a t shirt. And a condom. Not attractive.
Correct me if I'm wrong, but did you let me pee in the grass while barking? And also, how many of you have videos?
You just kept screaming "COME GET ME OFFICER, MY ALLIGATOR MEANS BUSINESS" while swinging a beanie baby alligator at him.
I know he's only a bandaid for my emotional disrepair, but he can stick me anytime!!
went out to hit golf balls, ended up doing splits at the bar. you're a bad influence.
She's writing hockey erotica again.
Tell her to pick another team besides ours this time.
i made that whipped coffee shit today. took six pouches of instant espresso.
please tell me you didn’t consume six shots of espresso
:)
i can feel colors
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