How long do you need to date somebody until it is acceptable to fart in their presence?
The real question is how long do you need to date them to dutch oven them?
but i have a bet that her boyfriend is going to try and deflower her tonight so i better get a move on if i want to videotape it
I was high enough to think chocolate sauce on bagel bites was a good idea
I apparently tried to stop my spending of money by sealing the top of my wallet with gum
We were laughing at the passed out guy who had gone to sleep under the car in the McDonald's lot until we realized it was you.
I literally sat down and peed with my underwear still on. How does that happen?
Correct me if I'm wrong here... but did we serenade each others breasts to "winds of change" last night?
Quick question: how long can sperm live in a rug?
This whole night would have been avoided if the liquor store had air heads
Bible prof is the guy I made out with at the gay bar on the fourth. He doesn't remember.
I learned so much about myself in that shower.
Just got a Snapchat of his dick with the caption 'We miss you.'
That's true love, there.
I think you should just bang him and get it out of your system.
That's what you say about everyone.
this party is nice, but i have to go home and cry over anime in order to fill my daily quota of suffering
So, is Canada considered an excessive distance to go for a booty call? Asking for a friend...
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