We drank from noon till 5 am, there was adderall and nice jews involved it was just crazy
so I smoked with the leasing agent of the apartment complex. Of corse I am going to take this one
...and the foreplay consisted of me threatening to cut off his hand if he didn't remove it from my back.
The last thing I remember is your grandma calling me a pussy and taking my shot for me. Your family is awesome.
Omfg amy I'm not kidding you I think a blow job is what landed me in the hospital
Annnnddddd this chick is using a hand puppet made of a sock to give her research presentation...
Lost feeling in my face, my shoe and had a nose bleed. That's not wings. Fuck red bull.
Hahaha she was way into you and you kept arguing about burritos. It was amazing.
I'll just tell you, some how when we were having sex on Friday my collarbone got fractured.
still can't believe dude took a personal call while he was balls deep in my mouth.
Went as "Party on, Wayne." And left as, "Partied out Wayne in a foot boot with new medical bills." Fuck Halloween...and vodka.
you walked into the party, and all you had on was your left sock... literally.
Yeahh. im on the phone with him drunk. he told me he found a pigeon in a cardboard box and named it quincy...
You were yelling at them from the passenger seat saying you wanted your chicken for free because they couldn't prove it was from kentucky
Dad is wasting no time getting back out there. Just walked in on him and a Twin Peaks waitress in the hot tub
Randomize
