Lavender boy was great at seduction and crappy in bed.
He looked like the mexican version of Steve Carrell with a unibrow.
Does my surprise involve the use of a safe word?
Probably.
I'm in.
he was walking around the bar drinking wild turkey and gobbling simultaneously
i failed horribly. studying for that final was as pointless as Vinnie is to Jersey Shore
I just heard the term negative masterbation and I don't believe it
I hate it when she philosophizes drunkenly on my kitchen counter. not even sober do i understand latin.
This is a whole other level of drinking. Like the I used to eat paste with these people kinda drinking.
Just saw a guy I fucked in a clown suit in the bar. It's not Halloween. I have got to start making better life decisions.
Are sex swings allowed in dorms
Dude I'm at a Marijuana dispensary party. They are giving away BAGS of edibles
How do you keep ending up in these situations?
My dad is their accountant
How about to stay friends we only have sex on our birthdays. Maybe national holidays too. And days we get really drunk. Wanna get really drunk?
Do you remember vividly describing the shape and girth of my cock to that girl last night?
you're not celebrating your 21st birthday right unless you give a male stripper a hand job, flash the bartender, and win a free vibrator.
He’s older
Like “has a job and pays his bills” older or “still watches porn on DVD because he can’t figure out the Internet” older?
Randomize
