we dont do blackfin have a good night :)
come downstairs quick. our boyfriends are having a dance off in nothing but their underwear and shoes. and they have semis too.
The mall is playing a fucking country mix of lady marmalade.
welcome to maine.
I'm sitting here watching a kid lick a basketball- where have i gone wrong in life?
Tell mom and/or dad that I am going to be home late. I am really blazed. Don't tell them that part, though.
I just won't go as hard tonight. Four dollar ladies night drink or drown is not a good idea for me. I like to get my money's worth.
Of all the shitty people we associated with, you should be happy that I'm the one fucking your cousin. Sorry.
We interrupt your regularly scheduled Saturday morning programming with this important announcement: you are not the father. I repeat not the father. Congratulations and have a nice day.
You grinded and hooked up with a middle aged tiger woods look-a-like with manboobs. Tequila isn't for you.
Matt. This is the manager of qdoba. Pick up the phone. Your friend needs you.
I rang in the new year by giving a lap dance to a Lutheran minister in a roomful of people including his wife. Jesus would be proud.
I was screaming out for people to gather the townsmen and the mayor so we could hang him
I want a bottle of whiskey to be dropped at my doorstep like a stork drops babies when they are delivered to their parents.
God what have you done to be that much in need of alcohol.
Me WANTS my preciousssssssssss
Finally smoked with my brothers, I feel like I just won gold at the Best Older Brother Ever Olympics
You said if the geese can walk on the lake so can I.
Randomize
