how about we just leave your boyfriend out of this
can you buy anything in the cafeteria for less than $2? I spent the last of my laundry money on a chia pet
I couldn't even finish, she was lounder and more annoying than DJ Khaled
what am i going to do when LOST is over? What am i going to get high to?
i was trying to give him roadhead and my tits kept knocking his cheap shifter into neutral...was the first time my tits have ever cock blocked me
Ironically her ferret's toys look like her sex toys.....this is a whole new level of kinky for me
If that really is brett favre's penis, no wonder she ignored his calls
I don't remember her missing an ear while we were at the bar
I'm drinking too much free beer
Thats like saying one owns too many kittens. It's not possible.
He's asking if he can send a dick pic. How do I politely decline that?
My biggest accomplishment thus far this summer is having sex 5 weeks after hip surgery.
HOW DO YOU GET TO BE A GROWN-UP AND NOT KNOW WHAT A DECADE IS!?
Some chick asked if she could eat me because I'm dressed as a taco. I introduced her to RJ. Best Wingman.
Yesterday you said I was the best.
No. I said you DID your best. There's a huge difference.
I'm storing dick pics, so basically if I'm still single after residency...ur gonna get bombarded. It's gonna be a blizzard of dicks.
Feel free to keep your blizzard of dicks to yourself.
Randomize
