nothing screams I HAVE A PROBLEM! like the case of miller lite sitting on top of my DUI papers in the passenger seat of my car. lol
imagine playing with puppies while we're drunk.
Like... we could film it and put like, "do you believe in magic" as the backround song and it would be complete joy.
found some acid from a couple months ago while looking through christmas lights. Looks like santa came early this year.
Normal people don't sit around and watch Degrassi for twelve hours...
FUCK YOU.
We were squawking at each other for over an hour like chickens. Literally. Never touching the stuff again and never again showing my face at that Denny's.
I don't know if its because i'm stoned or what but painting my kitchen yellow makes it look crooked
Are you absolutely against sleeping in your car? Because i've done that before.
there are casual beer cans in all of the public trashes, i belong here
I am dressed. And we didn't do anything. He's gorgeous and tall tho. Something nice to look at when I'm hungover
Do you know how I hurt my ankle or my shoulder? Or the origin of any of the following mystery bruises: left quad, left wrist, right elbow. Thanks for playing.
I woke up on your bathroom floor, i used your towel I found laying on the floor as a cape to get to your bed. I thought it would help me walk straight if I looked like a superhero
If you do wifi you would be helping my penis out & real friends care about their friends penises...
Pack light, we're going straight to bar from the train. No place to put our shit.
Dude all I'm bringing is my dick and a phone charger.
I dapped up a cop while leaving the party
Sex was great. Left his house while he was asleep but on the plus side I was able to get gas station food.
Randomize
