These people need to leave so I can have rum and Doritos at work like every other American.
Bring booze and chicks. Separate, or one already in the other. Your call.
i think beer pong is the only time ive ever found a use for geometry
after the cops left he pulled the weed out of his ass and we smoked it
i have my own cum on my nose right now. don't talk to me about "embarrassed".
just made one giant jello shot... if i have to study on a saturday night, i'm gonna do it as drunk as possible
I am the slutty bisexual glue that holds this friendship group together.
Im chasing shots of tequila with chocolate milk right now. by myself. its nasty, but I've had worse in tjere the past couple days, so ill take it.
The sad part is that if I don't get a random pic of your balls or ass or both every month, I start to worry that we're not friends anymore
That's the ultimate walk-of-shame: running away from your own apartment and hiding in a McDonald's.
He's talking about feelings now. I don't even know if he came???
the next morning we realized we didnt speak the same language... guess i subconsciously did learn a little german last semester. thanks study abroad.
ah the experiences a semester in Vienna can give you. Frau would enjoy knowing that even while sleeping during class you still managed to learn enough german to get laid
Should I be concerned that he called me mom when I got in bed on top of him?
so i may or may not have just had sex on the stage of the lecture hall....
Let's get this straight. I am six fucking feet tall. Do you even understand how limited my options in guys to date are? No. Did you see my last three boyfriends? I looked like a fucking giant next to them. So I will fuck this six-foot-seven Italian model even if I am the ugliest girl at this party because, goddammit, I deserve to.
Randomize
