on a side note you can NOT make bong water out of a pear
she said she was gay. i said prove it. she said "ok i wont fuck you"
a search helicopter?!
just found out this city drinks more beer during oktoberfest than rhode island does in a year.. i'm never leaving
We had sex under a tree in his boss's backyard, then I hooked up with his best friend. I don't even care how I got home.
My password hint says "not sunset, also facebook." i need to stop doing computer things while high. I will never figure this clue out.
I should have questioned it early on when they said bring beer and chocolate syrup
She kept throwing quarters at him and yelling "Goooaaallll!!" whilst taking her clothes off one by one. I'd say she had a good night
He just showed up with a bottle of wild turkey a half a can of coke and some marshmallows yelling "gobble gobble bitches" my roommates hate my cousin
Trying to figure out if the guy I'm with right now is the same guy I met spring break
Oh duude it is the guy from spring break! Awk.
So shaving my butt whilst humming "be prepared" is now in my top five weirdest Friday night activities.
I'm actually pinning crap for Friendsgiving like a boss right now. These bitches better show up.
It's my birthday, if I want to stay home, get stoned and watch the gameshow network, that's what I'm going to do.
Sarah was butt-chugging wine and diarrhea'd all over the wall
alright well you definitely hurt his feelings though you told him he looked like he was going to an Amish community prayer meeting..
Randomize
