I'm still trying to decide if it's a complement when he said "I'd like to subscribe to your daddy issues".
How do the freshmen here NOT understand the tricks we are playing on them by now? Doesn't bode well for grad numbers. Idiots.
some fat dude with wolverine facial hair just walked out of your room with a snuggie. explanation needed.
You crawled through a doggy door 5 times for a shot if cheap vodka.
I may be in the process of acquiring a second male fuck buddy and dating a girl....FUCKING STOP THE TRAIN I'M ON! THIS IS NOT A DRILL!!
I think i'm going to homewreck at this Disney on Ice show.
He said that I looked like a "ghost had crawled up into my vagina and died"..so yeah, I'd say the hangover was noticeable.
I went on an adventure and now we have more food.
Well, really we just have fire sauce and cookies. But they're edible.
Though the booty shorts might give me an extra discount. Or arrested. We'll see.
It's always great when the guy I get pills from sends me an email that says "I know you will get clean it's going to be hard but I know you can do it"
please come here right now, that girl who always gets her boob out is here and she brought taco bell
It's not your birthday unless mom picks you up at the bar
I haven’t taken my socks off in over 36 hours. I should add that to my bumble profile.
Sean just lit a cig with his taser..... I am in awe
really enjoying the fact I don't remember how the staff party ended. feel like I need to shame drink today
feel at noon?
Randomize
