There's something fitting about a hot in-car interracial makeout to the tune of 'healing the world.' RIP Mike.
That chode just called off the engagement. I just dropped his toothbrush in the toilet. And I’ve forgotten to take my birth control for the past two weeks. He’s fucked!
I got her a Nickelback box set.
well we are all hammered and my parents are reminiscing about all the times they drove us home drunk from Christmas
One date. That's all it took. I want to have his geunis babies in me. One date.
So I'm seriously debating forwarding these sexts to his horse faced new gf including the ones that say he still loves me... but I still need his check to clear... decisions decisions
wine pong. its mother daughter day and i think she's mad. I smell like jager
But I'm currently thinking of all my bad decision making last night and giving myself a time out.
SCOTCH AND CIGARS AT THE TITTY BAR. YOU ARE COMING WITH US.
I can check masterbating in China off the bucket list.
I thought I came here to hook up, not for a Study Abroad 101 session
I told you that you couldn’t eat fifty tacos, you slapped me in the face, ate seventeen tacos, and fell asleep on my floor
well i blew him then my wife blew him, so im guessing we'll be seeing him around, yeah
he went down on me WHILE i ate BACON PIZZA! best. boyfriend. ever.
only 3 drinks in and he showed me his fursuit, please come pick me up
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