I'm so hungover And my mouth is so dry it feels like my tongue is wearing a sweater
Some guy just watched me feed 30 dimes and 3 quarters for bread and cheese at the self checkout at walmart. I no longer comprehend shame...
Isn't that the only thing she's good at? Complaining and blow jobs?
If I can't get a one-legged man to love me, what the hell chance do I have with a NORMAL guy???
After he called me a "spirited little girl" I realized that I need to stop sleeping with guys more than ten years older than me.
But she tried her best to break my penis, so she has a few free passes with me
My mom and dad are smoking a joint while lecturing me on what to bring and how to act in Europe. I'll finish this glass of wine and head over.
I stole so many things from the ER last night.
hungover waitressing a bar association event. im being judged by actual judges.
My vagina is not really on board with my "emotional issues"
Currently studying Econ, while waiting outside current booty call's residence for him to return from the strip club. This is your fault.
I'm wandering around outside asking things if they are god
The medical term is prolapsed anal walls if you want to look into it with dignity.
I’ve gone two rounds already this morning and I’m ready for a third. The moon is in the house of sluticus hornius.
Damn that sucks I haven't needed pants the whole time i've been here
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