After he finished I threw up my arms and shouted STEVE HOLT!
I have a love/hate relationship when men come within a 10 minute time frame.
Lady came into work yesterday. Full on stache and beard. I've never concentrated on making eye contact harder in my life.
On a list of weird places to get a bj, how weird is in the basement of a pharmacy
Today was my first day of hebrew and I learned how to say give me sex... I think I can quit now
thursday was literally the first time i didnt drunk eat since the bush administration and it was only because i was fucking someones boyfriend. making a mental note to do that more often.
picked up a girl by parallel parking. i love this town already.
she blew me in the men's room in the restaurant. it was a french bistro, so it was okay
I just ate four packages of Swiss Rolls. Being high and on food stamps is AHmazing.
I feel like his penis would have a weird haircut because he does.
I am one Jewel song away from suicide watch
If thou doesn't answer thou phone thou shall receive a barrage of Dick pics. It's the eleventh commandment.
ive decided that just saying "yes" when people assume I am something other than Caucasian will highly benefit my love life. last night I was native.
Don't worry about me. I am infinite.
Alcohol. Making me feel good about myself since 2008
Randomize
