Does adding vodka to a protein shake defeat the purpose?
Two kids are drinking pounders in class. I think I'm hanging out with the wrong group of friends.
I don't know what's more sad having a rewards account at a liquor store or already racking up 273 dollar points since january
There's a pair of socks on the bar. No-one's questioned this.
Every once in a while you'd chuckle to yourself, and when I asked you what's so funny u replied "sometimes my toes tickle eachother"
It was a karaoke bar combined with a liquor store and had a donkey pen in the back.
Keeping it classy as usual I see
I got eye-fucked by an 80 year old man wearing a cowboy hat while I was singing country. How do you think karaoke went?
We can just keep having sex until one of us finds someone we actually like
Lesson of the night: never take shots out of a bottle you found under a couch in a frat house. I have no idea where I am
I'm pretty sure my lung is caught on my rib. And I can't feel the left side of my face. Best. Sex. Ever.
The worst part about being a grammar Nazi is all the porn I skip over because the titles are misspelled
I just sustained a forearm injury dancing to salt n peppa in my kitchen. Fack. I pushed it real good.
He will be so fat that the winter can not penetrate his blubber.
Nope. Im a prince of the americas. I treat my women like future queens. Also, im drunk watching the royal wedding
Only true party girls take their birth control with Smirnoff.
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