I think I gave almost everyone at that party the clap last night
i mean i'm ok with bufu but if i'm gonna do it it needs to be a mutual agreement, and there are steps that need to be taken. you don't just go OOPS we're doing it now
we just made rock paper scissors into a drinking game
Not too sure about the toy story pull ups. The kids point to their crotch all day and say woody.
Ordered weed last night from the delivery service, and who showed up...my old real estate broker. He said, "this is less stressful." Duh.
The melted ice in my drinks tonight is probably the most water I've had in like 3 days accumulated.
I know this is random but to this day I regret not having sex with you on that atv on the top of that mountain underneath the American flag.
OH BABY IM HERE AND IN A BLANKET FORT
COME TO THE BLANKET FORT
I was so exhausted I thought about using my deep throat spray to stop my coughing.
I'm at home, drinking with my cat. While this is an enjoyable lifestyle, other plans are preferable.
I feel like we should at least be hungover if we're gonna be this grown up.
We could make it cute. Like "oh those two cute lesbians who are about five foot two who sell the cocaine down the street. You know the ones? With the Yorkies?"
When you get home...find me in the shower. Only safe place at the moment.
my life could not get any worse. just saw my sister in a porno
Go have fun. I'm gonna go shower off the regret.
Randomize
