i cvme to yuor rooom...wherer are youf?
please be gone before i get back
she was hot for a redneck and i dont look at teeth
so he came in my eye... should i throw out my contacts?
I'm so drunk that I ordered a root beer at the bar. Whoops?
you know how i said i wouldn't send that pic message of your lofted bed falling from you fucking a fat chick? that was after i sent it to your mom
in the middle of it he kept shouting: im going to be masturbating to this for the rest of my life
I'm not saying he has herpes, I'm just saying he slept with my friend that has herpes.
I just woke up and my mouth tastes like I licked the bathroom floor in the last ghetto bar we were in. I'm going to get my mouth checked for chlamydia. Do I see a dentist for that?
There is a hole in her door about 2 inch in diameter. You may see me on YouPorn
I mean I sucked his dick at 3 AM... UNDERWATER. I think I have earned a follow back on twitter.
Literally just saw a 7 year old intently rub his penis on the metro. I'm not ready for this
Wife and kids came home early...naked passed out covered in chili cheese Fritos dad will haunt them forever.
What is more embarrassing, shitting yourself in Mexico or having sex in a forest preserve with a 19 yr old? This is crucial research.
That's probably why white girls drink so much espresso. Piledriving coke and vodka crans takes a fucking toll man
Its like people have to train for months before they try and drink with us and survive...
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