Omg. I just woke up in a room full of naked people
I feel like ignoring a facebook event is a lot like a pocket-veto. The only difference is instead of opposing legislation, I don't want to go to your sketchy party.
at a bar and heard one girl tell another her tampon string was showing she goes i dont want it in anymore anyways. then proceeds to pull out her tampon in the middle of the bar and leave it on a plate. ewwww
oh i have no idea about his personality. i imagine it's the same as it was- except now combined with a receding hairline and a beer gut
I still think it's messed up that you're naming your kids after all the guys you slept with in college
It really ruins the moment when you have to ask to resend the nude pics.
We tried. It's impossible to cum while bouncing on a trampoline. It's like trying to sneeze while keeping your eyes open.
I just threw up every bad decision and it hurts
Dear future Eric, sorry about the Everclear. Sincerely, Eric +2 shots E.C.
Sweet. Warning: i have been drinking at work since 4. Plan accordingly.
If the world ends now I want you to know I was on my favorite toilet fighting the good fight.
Have you picked out a bathroom stall in which to fuck? Since you've got all this free time before her plane lands...
Let's be honest, I am pretty sketchy looking.
She showed up after 3 hours and proceded to make us all feel like resonable human beings. I dont know how she did it but she did it.
I'm going to the store to get corona, salad, and blunt wraps...
Randomize
