I play with my boobs when I'm bored. I playwith my nipples whe I'm drunk
how do i tell him I'm always in the mood without sounding like a slut?
I spent the whole party making out with some guy. He wasn't that cute but six of my sorority sisters are fighting over him so I had to do something..
So the name of the kid from the sponsor a child comercial popped into my head while I was masturbating this morning. Needless to say I will now be now be donating out of guilt.
my roommate had a few special brownies and wrapped my purse and one of my shoes and left them under the tree for me...
I just came inside of a Gatorade bottle. That hungover.
bro i dont care how hot she was, you try keeping it up with the amount of puppet he had in her room, it was like fucking in jeff dunham's house
MAN I GOT NO SLEEP AND HAD A BREAKFAST OF SKITTLES AND ASPIRIN. I'M LIVING THE LIFE.
i made the walk of shame wearing her booty shorts that said juicy on the back. i'm still counting it as a good night
I'm torn between regretting everything and regretting nothing.
I just my had my first cup of coffee in a week. I think I might orgasm.
how do you know everyone's mad at you?
I just woke up feeling shameful
Just bedazzled a flask, while drinking out of it. Hot glue is EVERYWHERE.
I can’t shake the image of her gigantic black unibrow. It’s like I got a blowie from Eugene Levy
I just landed at Logan and some guy threw up in the baggage carousel. Boston never really changes
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