Myspace is for pedophiles and tweakers in the 818 trying to hook up. I always forget theres music there too
found my necklace. it was safe with all 6 boxes of peeps that i bought that night.
It's ok that you're screwing someone else while trying to get back with me, I'm banging three girls while I ignore you.
i feel we're the only people who'd use nyquil sexually
I slept with someone shorter than me. My vagina weeps.
You fool.
If you die first, I'm going to sleep with a pallbearer at your funeral.
They kept barging in on us saying random shit. At one point they came in yelling room service! and threw soda at us bruising my foot. Weirdest injury I have gotten during sex.
It's the eve of Christ's birthday and I'm sending pictures of my tits
The dominoes guy came back thirty mins later to ask me out. I guess he figures if I'm eating pizza alone I must have gotten dumped
Whoever jacked off in MY pong room on the bean bag with your fucking googles pick up your fucking cum towel you gross disgusting fucks. I said NO MORE jacking off in that room. I swear I will empty it out if this is going to continue.
Are you alive? Cause this is my official "im actually alive" text.
What happened last night dude?
YOU SHIT ON MY FUCKING COFFE TABLE THATS WHAT FUCKING HAPPENED!!!
Fuck man, I am really high rn and all I've eaten is different forms of pie
Just did the "lost my phone, need #'s" post and I got a text saying "go ahead and save me as Ashley-DD because I know you will anyway. I think I love her.
Reverse road head. Sa-witch!!!
Randomize
