so i was creeping on him today and there was like nothing new except he became a fan of getting dome
i wish i could be like. "i like giving dome, lets be friends"
i think our first tip to leave should have been when we saw the drinks were coming out of a gas can
"reccomended dose" hasn't been in my vocabulary for quite some time.
He's a navy seal. He can stick it anywhere he wants.
Stop. He threw up in front of Madison Square Garden security. Spit at the guys feet and grunted ughhh at him.
It's an "im going to have to shit with the lights off" type of morning
this is getting really bad. i thought the chandelier in the dining room was one of those claws from the claw games in an arcade and i spent the past five minutes jumping left to right so the claw wouldn't grab me
I wouldn't have puked last night if I didn't inhale straight pepper from you shattering the pepper shaker on the wall.
I'm riding shot gun after Shawn took a dump in a happy meal box because we were making record time.
Just threw up in the MSO airport men's room. We're at that point this morning.
I made that picture of you my lock screen. So I've just been standing around at work licking my phone all day.
PICK ME UP NOW I THINK THIS MOTEL IS A CRIME SCENE. also congrats on your engagement i saw the post on my phone while i was climbing out the window
my underwear is inside out , I have a giant hickie. I'm wearing last nights makeup. this is going to be the best day at work ever
I don't know if I'm dying or this is just a mild inconvenience
I will not abuse the gift that was given to me
You were given a vagina and you abuse that pretty hard
Randomize
