i can tell by the sound of your bed that he isnt that good at sex.
I wouldnt endorse that guy if he was walking in a walkathon to raise money for a disease i had
Apparently she came home completely covered in mud, pretending to be a bird...and she still had more sex than any of us this weekend.
This morning two of his housemate threw confetti over me, started singing and handed me a make shift trophy out of cereal boxes and beer cans that said 'Harry's Virginity' on it. Fucking brilliant!
It's total crap. On a side note I watched a porn of 4 guys wrestling in chocolate then messing around with each other. It was like a dream come true
He looks like a fat version of lurch from the adams family and smells like fritos. This is not the caliber man I want pleasuring himself to the thought of me!
He always tells me he misses my clit. I feel like I should make a drinking game out of it
Woke up in a sombrero and a males speedo. Tequila makes normal peoples clothes fall off, however it makes me fall into a questionable identity crisis
I just want to have sex that doesn't end like a B-rated horror movie.
IDK MAYBE BC I WOKE UP IN AN AIRPORT WITH A ONE WAY TICKET TO LONDON
Validation I posted a good pic? The lonely fuckboys send out the booty call signal. Of course I answered the call; Gotham needs its hero.
You had all day to plan ahead & get mixers, so whose fault is this sobriety?
I got up and left his place at 3am because I remembered I had a burrito in my car.
Can’t. It’s taco and dick night.
You think my vibrator will be okay in the dishwasher?
Randomize
