shes the kind of girl i dont like to talk to unless my penis is in her mouth.
I don't care if he is my ex... I have the deed to his dick until someone else fucks him. We broke up 2 years ago.... I am still holding that deed!
she said her black crocs were her 'dress up crocs'
Smoking bowl and applying to community college. I now know how I got here.
Does the blue bra belong to your sister or cousin?
remind me again why lemons and alcohol in the crock pot is a bad idea?
So i forgot that my head is completely wrapped in gauze, and tried to do the "come hither" look. He think's i'm brain damaged
It was disgusting, and I would've rather licked the condensation off the windows instead, but I figured that's wasn't very ladylike
Such a good question, let's ask the alcohol gods for the answer.
It's Saturday night and I'm sitting on my couch by myself, watching Glee, and drinking gin and tonics. If you listen very closely, you can hear the wails of my mother giving up hope that I will ever give her a son-in-law.
I fucking hate you. Some slutty looking drunk chick backed her ass up across the bar and started grinding on you. You ignored her because you didn't want to share you drink
I care about my drink far more than her feelings
Well his arms broken so they only cuffed his good wrist to his belt. That's how he cast smacked me in custody.
it's ok, no one ever died fom being sticky.
i've gotta research that and get back to you.
Girl just left one of the apts upstairs carrying a giant bottle of kahlula and a lunchable.... I feel like we could be friends
I'm too picky for internet dating and by picky I mean psycho.
Randomize
