Well you know what I always say about freshmen.... If you want it, and they've got it... get it.
Haha, just learned changing others iPhone passcodes is fun while drunk but not fun the next morning.
So Ive decided I have serious issues. Im walking around the school with a bag labeled booze money collecting from people while slightly hungover at 8:20 in the morning, and nobody is questioning me.
I came home drunk to my night light on and a Hershey's bar on my bed. Mom knows me too well.
btw he is cheating on one twin with the other. the main woman in his life has a mullet. I defiantly have either the coolest or weirdest uncle ever
I was more concerned about the amount of mcdonalds fries on the floor around me than i was with my lack of clothes.
I just scrubbed chocolate off the bathtub... You better have had a damn good birthday
Sat in the shower and reenacted the "Wiggle your big toe" scene from Kill Bill. THAT hungover.
Is it some european holiday today? We both woke up to find loaves of bread in our rooms...
You know this who 'I show my love by being a total dick' thing is getting old, right?
I'm gonna give him birthday punches. On the dick. With my mouth.
I vaguely remember hanging my bra off the ceiling fan and chugging a beer during sex
College has turned you into quite the multi tasker huh?
After a little too much, I decided public urination was a constitutional right.. Nearly got deported for that one
your penis is a great and majestic leader among the penises.
I need to stop waking up with no pants on.
what happened this time
I dont know everyone was gone and there was a bird in the room
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