This kristen chick is fuckin nuts. She's pyscho. She's a trainwreck. She carries baggage. She's... Perfect.
I'm sorry, but there's just something about mesh over nipples that irks me.
So J keeps drinking his last bit of drink, then spitting it out and drinks it again. Savor the flavor?
last night they convinced you that a sharpie was a new style of chap stick... so when you wake up, you might want to do something about that
I closed that bar. Sang every Beatles song in the book. Made Somoan friends.
If she wasn't my friend I'd think she was a huge slut
just spent the last 4 hours covering his room in sticky notes. Viva Drunk Thursdays.
Its what im here for. Critiquing penis photos.
Turns out that my surprise "happy birthday" drop-in for my dad turned into a "my parents like afternoon sex a lot" realization.
Hefty paycheck and not get wasted can't exist in the same night
Who wants vodka and apple sauce
Let's go one conversation without mentioning cats or alcohol someday.
Imagine the quality of nudes you could send with a selfie stick
Right?? Give me some apple scented candles and I'm a fall wet dream
No idea but I'm preparing for 4 tequila shots and tons of vomit
Randomize
