gavin joseph was born around 1 oclock 9lbs 12oz... over 21 inches long
Thats what she said
btw, your gf is going to want to talk to you today...and consequently you're probably not going to want to talk to me...just a heads up
you fell asleep during kickboxing this morning
how does that even happen??
And by the way, how is me getting head even remotely comparable to you fucking 3 guys?
You should probably wake up already as I have yet another story for you. Teaser? Blood from knife wound. Tequila. Guitar hero. Kitchen counter. Lawyer.
You've got the short couch unless you find some girl to take you home
Challenge accepted.
Nah the bridesmaids all had dates. I slept with the next best thing: girl who WANTED to be a bridesmaid but didnt make the cut.
no more heavy drinking durning the lady that cleans the office told me i have to emtpy my own thrash if i puke in it
I can't even tell you how many rave sticks I tore apart with my teeth last night.
Smoked Hookah in the playhouse last night. Childhood was so fun.
Im organizing a group to help fondle my shoe. Too many shots dude. Too many.
Seriously, I want to give you a plaque thanking you for your dedicated service to my vagina.
also Jesus you really need to change your diet. I just washed your baby gravy out of my hair and it's so acidic my hair is damaged. You have killer sperm
I made everything so magnificently awkward in under 15 seconds. I am magic.
Dude I pissed in her little brother's closet and when I tried to flush the doorknob her parents came out and saw me standing there naked, no more ambien for me
Randomize
