I swear if I see one more guy in a v-neck and fedora I'm going to punch someone in the balls. This is philly, you're not supposed to look like Ryan Cabrera
all thats left of you is your magnum wrapper on my dresser
I could be a Disney star with the amount of nude photos of mine that get leaked.
I can't ever handle being "that girl" again. At least not until next semester.
I hate that the only Italian aspect of me is I get red and sweaty when I drink
Everyone is hammered wasted already...young, old, the dying, babies...we got them all
At some point tonight the bad ideas in my head became bad decisions that happened outside my head
Unfortunately hes not a hipster douchebag with no life goals, so naturally I'm not interested.
I put you to bed and you would not go unless I let you sleep with the vodka
its so sad we are done celebrating 21st bdays everytime one of us turned 21 everyone else got laid
That guy was drunk and couldn't get it up so he just tried to scissor me.
I used my dress as a plate for pizza rolls last night
Did I tell you guys I was bisexual last night? I just had a flashback
Is it weird to smoke a bong with a client from work?
Maybe I’ll just go to the party as myself
What, a homewrecker?
Touché
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