Wow, you were right... Weed does start conversations
Is it bad that John just came to my work to have sex with me bc I felt bad that he slept on his porch last night locked out and I missed all his calls?
She's the barista slut.
How was your 8:30 class today?
Non existent. I just threw up in my water bottle on the bus.
So somebody asked her is she's okay.She turned around,started running and screamed "Ballet is running through my veins" before doing a small pirouette.It's amazing how she managed not to fall.
And by "schedule" I meant crumbled up liquor store receipt, that I wrote shit on.
Bro, you're like, my right testicle. Can't go anywhere without you.
I lost all of my bathing suit tops.. This is both a success and a failure
She loves introducing her friends to my foreskin.
The feeling are messing with the penis
I have really important information for you regarding the furry convention this weekend
Jello shots and homoerotic movie scenes bingo?
So what your saying is you dont remember trying to hit a golf ball off my chest with a 9 iron?
tonight...tonight im having sex in honor of you
What you have to understand is that our lives aren't a disappointment so much as they crashed and burned with lethal doses of radiation and dog shit.
Randomize
