i think i've said "don't judge me" 10+ times tonight... is that a bad thing?
yes
... don't judge me
just convinced brandon semen are bugs that crawl in your pants and make gooey juice. now hes convinced he has them lmao
it's like i can feel the ghost of his dick still inside me
We started playin just the tip, then shit got crazy
That doesn't help it make any more sense. Because now you've brought pinata condoms into this.
I found out his name. Apparently we sat in the shower together and flooded the bathroom.
Dude how did you get resin on my keyboard?
The sense of comroderie I've built with my liver over the course of this semester is beautiful
Judging by the progress I've made since I woke up (none) I'm thinking this hangover may keep me in bed.
I was behind him snuggling, I told him I was the big spoon and he told me I was too little it was more like he was wearing a backpack.
GOOGLE HAS JUST RELEASED AN UPDATE THAT ALLOWS YOU TO CATCH POKEMON USING MAPS. Pack your shit, our time has COME.
You were throwing cups at people in the basement, yelling at them to get out of your swamp.
She was here for a threesome... She doesn't have to put the new roll of toilet paper on the dispenser. She can leave the new roll wherever she wants!
I just bought condoms and a potted plant, making for a top ten super weird and awkward purchase.
I can't really feel a difference, so essentially I paid 60 bucks to bedazzle my vag.
Randomize
