shes got a really nice body. but her face is eh.
you dont need a face to have sex
We discussed how the marijuana was making the dopamine float around our nucleus accumbens last night when we were high. Yet another example of how our science classes are perverting our good times.
he suggested we appoligize to eachother. then do blow and painkillers & have ourselves a make-up party.
Changing from sweatpants to jeans at 3 in the afternoon makes the day seem so much more productive than it actually was.
The dog threw up again, this time IN the toilet. I've taught him well.
So if we break up over this are you still gonna come over and do my dishes?
I woke up naked in his kitchen...His name is Mike and we're having a "what happened last night" beer.
Where the hell is he. I called him crying for weed and sex you would think that would signal some urgency.
That's what my new years consisted of. Consoling heartbroken girls and having people throw up in my hands.
I just hope I don't wheeze during sex
He's like a computer from 2001 in a 2014 world. It just doesn't work. Lots of glitches.
i now understand why vodka
Hey guys.. So I accidentally broke the front door last night
When are you getting back?
Well google maps doesn't have an estimated time for crawling... Could be days
all i know is that i woke up at 12:00 am in a shower with egg shell in my hair. i am 90% sure you are responsible.
Randomize
