The answer is no. Its an illegal search n seizure!
if he's not good at sex i should be allowed to have sex with someone who is. that's a totally legit statement i think
the liquor store owner came out from behind the counter and kissed my cheek when he saw that i am back for fall semester
We had sex in the bathroom. Then he told me I could watch him pee.
You know your in for a great weekend when you buy the booze already in crutches
Woke up in my underwear and Christmas sweater. Only. Eggnog has won the battle but not the war.
We were escorted through the guys dorm by 5 kids with nerf guns and zelda shields. I felt like the president with a fucked up secret service squad.
got into a verbal altercation with Luke Harangoty last night over a table. Called him a cross-eyed fuck and got the table.
There's going to be a velveeta shortage. I'm not drunk any more, this is just dire info.
I think the reason she hasn't text me back is because I spanked her ass with Hulk Hands
I am so horny that I an legitimately concerned for your safety when I see you tonight.
i woke up wearing a life jacket, holding on to a footlong hotdog, and had on a mr. hustle 1995 shirt on
good night
Thanks for making me a drunk burrito last night and cutting it into bite size pieces, I always knew you were a keeper.
Did you put my shoes in the freezer.
Nope. I did however put them in the kiddie pool you pissed in in the living room before Tyler put them in the freezer. Ass hole.
Third time this week I've caught co workers dry humping. Quarantine really changes people's priorities.
Randomize
