Well you know what I always say about freshmen.... If you want it, and they've got it... get it.
ugh, i have officially sinned in all of my cute clothes. i can't even wear any of them without feeling regret.
is the fantasy fufillment of sex in a hot tub worth the possible infection?
I don't know how to tell my mom that I'm not sober enough to drive to the dentist...
In attempts to Not be THAT GIRL in front of my new crush I will only drink a 12 pack instead of my normal case.
you said you couldnt let go of the fence because your hand was molding to it.
My sister came home, pulled two nalgene bottles of jaeger-bomb out of the fridge, changed out her 3 inch heels for 6 inch heels and left in under 3 minutes. I've never been more proud of her.
heres the thing, we have 120 cans of beer left in the fridge. until thats finished we cant fit food in the fridge
Also, turning on the light this morning was a 3 step process. Way too hungover.
Or stump rather since he's possibly large. Large penises don't have tips, just blunt ends of battering rams.
Bianca brought a stripper home he's making me breakfast
Today's hangover is probably top 3 of all time. Just threw up in an envelope. I'm on the ferry and didn't want to get out to puke over the side because I thought I might fall in the river.
But can mardi gras accurately capture the essence of my tiny rage?
Drunk. Send nudes. Just curious.
Its like Gods punishment for wanting to party
Randomize
