redhead is getting on the bull...again red head is getting on the bull!
She has never blacked out. I have tried to get her to so many times. Apparently it's a lot harder than we make it out to be.
At least drunk me was smart enough to stash toilet paper in my bag before I started my walk home. Finally countless squat pees and wiping with grass taught me to be prepared.
You better wipe the dick of your lips before you come smoke this blunt.
She pulled a wad of lint out of my bellybutton while she was blowing me. Said she's never seen anything like it. I've never gone soft so fast.
i think the theme of this summer is "shitting in weird locations."
You force fed me pizza in bed last night. That was fun
Like for real, is your junk ok? I have to look after my investments.
No. If I hated you would get none. Then I would eat them all in front of you and laugh at your tears. Although that hasn't been ruled out for entertainment purposes. Nothing purposeful.
Stormed out of the house in frustration and now I'm in public and have to take a rage dump. Today sucks.
"Let's do body shots off the freshmen" is officially the worst thing I've ever said.
Who the fuck gets injured on a merry-go-round? HOW IS IT POSSIBLE??
There's just no proper way to thank a man for that many consecutive orgasims.
There way too many people in that club who have had their dick in me
I'm pretty sure he sprained my clit...
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