it sounded like he was fisting a can of crisco.
wow, so sex, not that great its like masturbating with a warm towelette, like the kind you get at a japanese restaurant
I did something last night that I shouldn't have, but I don't want to tell you because you'll probably just make it your fb status...
I see you've learned your lesson.
i hope someone procrastinates by putting up the pics up...
sarah said she can't even post all of hers due to facebook indecency rules
Just headbutted a photographer. This convention just got really interesting.
I apologize for violently hooking up with her in front of you in the jacuzzi last night.
I just saw a fat girl roll down the steps taking out three people with her, thought you should know.....
You are a special snowflake. A special snowflake I wouldn't mind rough sex with
Like I'm sorry but "it'll be fine trust me" IS NOT VERY REASSURING ASSHAT. Now take off your pants.
gin. gin. Gin. GIN GIN GINGINFFdJH
bitch, i have a flask. i've got things under control.
god. marry me.
In the last 2 hours I managed to have romantic starlit sex on the beach as the tide came in with not only just a gorgeous man, but one who happens to be Eastern European and finishing Harvard law school.
Oh wow. I want to be you right now.
Next time you decide to post pictures of yourself in your underwear on facebook, please don't tag me as your bulge.. My mom spent 10 minutes looking for me in that picture. I had to tell her I was hiding.
He was a foot taller than me and my hands were bigger than his, it's called Pity head
I kept my extra Molly pill in my wallet in the change part, that's also where I keep my body jewelry while I'm working. The nose ring punctured the pill essentially coating itself in MDMA. My nose ring is back in my nose. This could be entertaining
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